Concerned!!!!

Tomorrow I absolutely HAVE to do a long run!  I've been taking it easy because my knee has been giving me troubles, I'm in the middle of moving, and I've had a dang sinus infection.  So, I haven't been getting in my long, long runs.  I tried doing 13 miles a couple weeks ago but, my knee was really mad at me so, I only got 6 miles in!  GRRRR!

I had in my head that I had to do 13 miles.  Getting myself all psyched up for that.  However, I was a TINY bit off!  Tomorrow I'm scheduled to do 14 miles!!!!  I know it's just 1 mile more but, the last time I ran 14 miles was maybe 2 years ago?  So, I'm concerned, to say the least!!!!!  I'm still sick with the sinus infection.  I finally went to the Dr. and got on antibiotics but, it's only been a couple days on them and I'm EXHAUSTED from moving.  We'll see how tomorrow goes.

To be continued.....

Marathon Training Notes

Training for the marathon will be a little different this time.  One thing that's obvious is that I'm training on my own this time, for the most part.  Whereas, last time time I starting training with a group.  Training runs were with the group also.  Luckily, I do have my friend, Heather, that will come do long runs with me, if she's available. 

 So, here is my training routine.

Monday: Crosstraining as well as either working the lower half or upper half of my body.

Tuesday: Hill repeats.  What this means is I either pick a hill to run up and down on or, I set my treadmill to a 5-7 incline and run up and down the incline.  I follow the following pattern:

5 minute warm-up

60 seconds running uphill, then run back down.

70 seconds running uphill, then run back down.

1 minute breather/break

80 seconds running uphill, then run back down.

90 seconds running uphill, then run back down.

1 minute breather/break

90 seconds running uphill, then run back down.

80 seconds running uphill, then run back down.

1 minute breather/break

70 seconds running uphill, then run back down.

60 seconds running uphill, then run back down.

5 minute cool down

It ends up being right around 3 miles when I'm finished, so far.  It is a dang good workout for me but, as much as I hate hills, I've enjoyed this and can feel myself slowly getting stronger.  If I have time, I will follow up with ab work or some other sort of strength training.

Wednesday: Crosstraining and working my upper or lower body (opposite of whatever I worked on Monday).

Thursday: This is my hardest training day, next to my long runs.  This is speed training and it is extremely hard for me.  I start by doing a 5 minute warmup.  Followed by 1 minute running at a fast, uncomfortable speed, then run at my 10k pace (12 min. mile).  I go back and forth like that, as much as I can.  Eventually I need to be up to 2 minutes of sprinting.  Right now, at about 30 seconds, I'm hurting and can hardly breathe.

Friday:  I either crosstrain & incorporate strength training OR (depending on how I'm feeling that week) I will take the day off to prepare for my long run.

Saturday: This is my usual long run day.  If I have something going on a Saturday, then I will do my long run on a Friday.  My long runs started 6 weeks ago.  It started with 5 miles, then 6 miles, then 7 miles, then 8 miles, then 9 miles.  This week (Saturday), I run 10 miles.  Mentally, running in the double digit amount of miles, is messing with my head.  I'm nervous.  I seriously can't remember the last time I did a training run in the double digits.  Yes, I did a half marathon in February but, the furthest I had trained was 5 miles!  Not the best idea in the world.  

The rest of my long runs will go as follows:

May 7: 10 miles

May 14: 10 miles

May 21: 10 miles

May 28: 11 miles

June 4: 12 miles

June 11: 13 miles

June 18: 13 miles

June 25: 12 miles

July 2: 13 miles

July 9: 14 miles

July 16: 15 miles

July 23: 15 miles

July 30: 15 miles

August 6: 15 miles

August 13: 17 miles

August 20: 19 miles

August 27: 21 miles (SCARY)

September 3: 23 miles (HOLY CRAP)

September 10: 15 miles

September 17: 12 miles

September 24: 10 miles

October 1: ST. GEORGE MARATHON

Thursday, before the St. George marathon, I will be carb loading.  I will also be driving down to St. George this day.  Friday will be spent eating carefully, picking up my packet, and hydrating, hydrating, hydrating!!!!

With the help of my friend Brittney, she put together this training plan for me.  It's different in a lot of ways from the first time I did the marathon in 2013.  Last time I didn't incorporate any hill training or speed training.  I also didn't start training as early as I did.  By starting earlier, if gives me a little bit of extra time for sick days, etc.  It will also give me a stronger foundation for my marathon day.  Also, the longest training run I did, before the marathon in 2013, was 20 miles.  So, to say I'm nervous about the 21 & 23 milers is a major understatement.  We'll take it as it comes.  The other significant difference is the main portion of my training will be in Cache Valley, rather that St. George.  A couple perks to this is: #1 I will be training in higher elevation, which will HOPEFULLY make it easier for me on race day, with St. George being a lower elevation.  #2: I will not be training on the marathon route over, and over, and over, and over, etc.  Thus, I won't find myself growing bored of the highway like I did in 2013.  Some downsides to this will be: I will be training on a new territory for me.  Sure, I've done a few long runs up there but, the most was maybe 10 miles???  So, I will have to find new places to train, to people to hopefully do long runs with, and I'm sure I will feel very alone at first.  I just think that if I can do all of things successfully, I will be able to feel a HUGE sense of accomplishment and pride, knowing I had to motivate and be accountable for myself and what I do and don't do.  I also drive Brittney crazy by texting her quite a bit.

Races Completed in 2016....so far!

St. George 5k 2016

Dog town Half Marathon 2016

Lake to Lake Relay 2016

These are the races I've completed in 2016, besides the Dogtown Half Marathon I mentioned in the previous post!  The Lake to Lake was a TOUGH relay!  It was a lot of hills and I threw up and cramped badly!!!!  If it wasn't for the people on my team, I would have much hate for this race!!!  However, we DID win the award for the best decorated van!

It Begins Again!!!

In 2013, I participated and completed my first marathon.  It was a proud, exciting, happy moment!  One that I will NEVER forget and wouldn't trade for anything!!!!  Time followed and I was asked many times, "When will you another marathon?"  I've always answered with, "For me, running a marathon is like having a baby.  You usually wouldn't want to deliver a baby until you've forgotten much of the pain, etc. that goes into having a baby.  Same with a marathon.  I need time to forget what it took to finish that marathon."  I would tell people, maybe next year, or not this time, etc.  For some reason, about August last year, I kept thinking about possibly running the marathon in 2016.  The BIG difference with running a marathon this time vs. 2013 is that I'm not naive and oblivious to what the training would be like, how bad it would hurt, how tired it would make me, etc.  This time I know what to expect and it scares me more than it did NOT knowing, which is crazy.  Also, this time I won't be in St. George when I am training the big miles.  That really makes me nervous!  In St. George, if you are running double-digit miles, it's super easy and convenient to go hit Hwy 18 and get your miles in.  It's point to point, rather than running a circle or a there-and-back route.  In Cache Valley, the last time I did a long run, I ran from Paradise, through Hyrum, through Mt. Sterling, and then Wellsville!  4 cities!!!!  This time, I am training most of it by myself.  However, I don't mind that a ton.  I'm used to running by myself because I'm not as fast as most of the people I start the run with.  I enjoy my time and it's a great way for me to strengthen my will power and mind control because I don't have anyone there to push me.

As months went by, I kept considering doing the marathon.  Then, I did the Las Vegas Ragnar in November last year and I STRUGGLED!  More than I ever have, I think!  I really second guessed myself and put the thought out of my head.  I did a couple more races but, it still never triggered the thought of doing the marathon again.  Then, the change of mind happened.  Backstory: the Dogtown Half Marathon & 5k were coming up in February.  I didn't want to do the Half Marathon because it's quite the hilly race and I am terrible at hills.  So, I decided I'd do the 5k (which is uphill the first half but, at least it was only 1.60 miles half way, rather than 6.5 miles).  My friend, Amy, had agreed to do the race with me and I was feeling excited about it.  Ok, so in December I submitted an entry to win a free Dogtown Half Marathon entry.  I completely spaced it because I really didn't want to do it.  Well, at the beginning of February I got a notification on Facebook, letting me know that myself and Amy had won a free half marathon entry!  EEEEEEEK!!!!!  What was I going to do?!?!!?  I had a decision to make and I didn't know which race to do!  I wasn't trained for a half, by any means!  However, I kind of liked the idea of challenging myself and to see what I could do!  Unfortunately, Amy wasn't able to do the half marathon so, I was on my own!  HOLY CRAP!!!!  I decided to do the half marathon.  I was SUPER NERVOUS!!!!!  Would I and could I complete this?  So, I went to my friend Amber and asked her the brutal question to get an honest answer.....do you think I can do this?  She didn't even hesitate with a yes, she knew I could do it!  I came to learn that a handful of others I knew were doing it also.  That helped me for sure.  

Race day came and I was a ball of nerves.  Luckily, I was able to pick up Amber and her friend to go to the buses together and go to the starting line.  At the starting line, I also ran into my good friend's, JJ, Brittney, Dustin, Mitch, and a few others I recognized.  It seems like each year they change something on the course.  I don't know why that is but, it drives me crazy!!!  Well, this year was no different!  The starting line was in a completely different spot than where it was the first time I did the half marathon.  This time you started going uphill, which is RUDE! It was a lot of rolling hills and my toes went to sleep within the first few miles.  I will say that I felt happy though and I felt good.  Along the way, I ran into a woman named Polli!  This woman was FASCINATING!!!!  She was on a mission to run 50 marathons before she turned 50! She was doing the Double Dog Dare, which is the half marathon course up and back!  Hard core!  Anyway, if it wasn't for her, I don't think I could've made it!  We leap-frogged each other the first 3/4 of it.  She was so motivating and would push me and keep me talking!  Polli inspires me SO MUCH!  At about mile 10, I really started to feel my lack of training.  I was hurting, tired, and really down!  At mile 10.75-ish you have to turn and head up this BEASTY hill!  It's a horrible hill!  One of those you think you're at the top, only to realize you're not!  Half way up the hill, around mile 11, I was doing the ugly cry and wanted to quit.  Amber and her friend Melissa had text me that they were coming back to find me.  I had no idea where they'd be.  Then, I got a call from Mike, who was waiting at the finish line.  He was calling to see where I was.  I just broke down sobbing!!!!!  He then did a very naughty, naughty thing!  He offered to come pick me up and take me home!  WHY WOULD HE DO THAT!  That was like offering alcohol to an alcoholic trying to quit drinking!  I said NO! and then carried on.  It wasn't pretty but, I kept moving.  Around mile 12, I came upon Amber & Melissa.  HALLELUJAH!!!!!!  They tried to get me running but, my get up and go got up and left!  I tried to run but, I was HURTING!  They gave me a bulls eye person to try and pass.  I just couldn't.  My goal was just to finish.  I am happy to say that I finished!!!!!  It wasn't even my worse time either!!!!  Out of all my races, besides the St. George Marathon, I was the most proud of this medal!  Sure, I didn't train like I should have and didn't finish with the best time.  However, I went out and did something HARD on my very own!  I earned this medal and I am dang proud of it!  I pushed myself beyond what I thought I was capable of!  My body supported me the whole crazy way!  It was in that moment that I though to myself ,"I am going to do the St. George Marathon!!!"

Back to Square One....kind of!!!!

I haven't posted on here for some time!  I think for a couple main reasons.  #1:  No one reads this so sometimes I think, what's the point? #2:  I'm embarrassed and disappointed with myself and how I haven't sticked to getting healthy, like I had been doing so well before.  I think now it's time to get back this, knowing that people still won't read it but also knowing that this is an excellent journal of my up AND downs in trying to achieve my goal of being healthy and looking more fit and healthy.

This year has been really tough for me, as far as fitness goes.  I felt like I lost my love and fire for racing.  This came for a few reasons (change in running partners, race partners, feeling defeated, etc.) but, mostly I was burnt out.  I felt like my purpose and drive for running was not really there anymore.  That scared me and I suffered for it, mentally AND especially physically!  I decided it was time to take a break from racing because racing was meant to be enjoyed and I just wasn't enjoying it.  However, I feel like I'm getting that fire back again.  It's been 2 years since I did the marathon.  My biggest fear and worry of doing it again was a fight I had mentally.  Mentally, I don't have the confidence, desire, or strength to do it again....until now.  I volunteered for the St. George Ironman as well as the St. George Marathon.  It did my heart and soul good to be part of those events.  Seeing those athletes, each and everyone of them, push their bodies to their limits, reminded me of why I was doing it in the first place.  I want to push my body and mind beyond the boundaries I have set for myself.  I think another reason I've been scared to do it is because I'm alone on my training.  The girl's I trained with the first time have all gone different ways with their training, and have different goals.  Jocelyn is KILLING IT in Crossfit and really loves and does well at it!  Amber Blair has taken to Ironman competitions, getting a lot stronger, and is do amazing things!  Amber Sheffield also has been doing Ironman competitions, swimming competitions, and getting stronger.  I know that I can't rely on others to push me through.  My friend's, Brittany & JJ, have been amazingly supportive.  Her and I talked about me doing the marathon again and she's already giving me the push and desire to do it!  I know they'll help me anyway they can and give me support!  Then, there are a couple other girl's who have said they would like to do the marathon and run with me.  Amber Blair is doing it next year and said she'd love to carpool for the long runs so, that takes a huge stress off!  Unfortunately, I am not naive to the training it takes for a marathon so, it's scary and makes me nervous but, stepping out of my comfort zone is really going to help me grow.  I want to prove to myself that I can do better and have more faith and confidence in myself and my abilities.  On top of that, I need to get back to losing weight and getting healthy again because I know I can do it!!!!

I'm dealing with kidney stones in my left kidney.  It's very painful and can prevent me from doing things sometimes.  I am hoping that by exercising more and eating healthier, that I will be in less pain until the stone decides to pass or break up, etc.

My next race that I am actively training for is the Las Vegas Ragnar.  It is in 2 weeks and I'm excited!  It's the most fun race!  I really enjoy it! I will be doing the Baker's Dozen Half Marathon Relay in December.  That's always a fun, low-stress race.   I also know that for my half marathon, to prepare for the marathon, I will be doing the Ogden Half Marathon.  I've ran the course a couple times, in running the marathon relay, and I really enjoy it.  It's beautiful, great temperatures, and an awesome crowd!

So, here's to starting over again, back to square one, kind of.

Meant to Be or NOT Meant to Be! THAT is the question!!!!

So, I'm scheduled to have breast reduction surgery on August 13, a week from TODAY!!!!  It's SO CLOSE but, feels like the universe is trying to keep it from happening.

Whether it's my insurance details, the Dr.'s office forgetting to fax stuff over to get my surgery on the admittance/docket list, the Dr.'s office forgetting to fax over the claim to my insurance or WHATEVER (the Dr.'s office claims to have faxed everything but, with the said faxes not showing up at both my insurance company AND the admittance department, I don't think that's just a missing fax)....I've just had it!!!!  I think one more blow and I will just forget the WHOLE DAMN THING!!!!  My parents and Mike's parents have been AMAZING and EXTREMELY SUPPORTIVE!!!!  My Dad keeps urging me on, telling me to NOT GIVE UP, and we'll make this happen.  I'm a ball of nerves and emotions.  Mike is upset, mad, stressed, and just over this whole thing.  He hasn't really wanted me to do it from the get-go and I don't think he really thought it would come to pass.  Nonetheless, here it is, staring me in the face, knocking on my door!  My Mom is supposed to come on Saturday, to help me with my kiddo's, etc. while I'm recovering but, even that is up in the air until we get the kinks, finances, and details all worked out!  With everything now being a last minute push because of the faxes supposedly getting lost in translation, I'm just SUPER STRESSED out!  This is SO out of my hands and it drives me crazy!  I hate waiting on other people to decided my fate.  It's like when I tried out for sport's teams and waiting to see if I made the team or not!  UGH!!!!

To most people reading this, you may think this is a small thing, not important, and stupid to worry about.  To me it is a BIG THING!  This surgery is something I've dreamed about for YEARS!!!!!  For it to be so close that I can touch it is KILLING me and to know I'm so close to having it not happen is KILLING me!!!!!  So, I guess this is TO BE CONTINUED.........

Bryce Canyon 1/2 Marathon 2014

On July 11-12th, 2014, Mike and I head to Bryce Canyon.  My brother-in-law Steve and I were signed up to do the Bryce Canyon 1/2 Marathon.  So, Mike and I met up with and shared a room with my sister, Stacey, and her husband, Steve.  It was really fun to see them, hang out, and just be goofy.  Especially with my sister!  We're good at being crazy and goofy together!!!!  Steve was exhausted was exhausted from having to be up at 3:30am to work that morning.  So, he immediately crashed in the hotel room the rest of the night, after we picked up our race packet.

****We just HAD to go to the Prairie Dog Gift Shop!  I still get a kick out of the name, since it has a gross connotation to it!  The ice cream was from HEAVEN!!!!****

We got back to the hotel to get ready for bed, etc.  My friend, Jocelyn, arrived later on.  She hung out and talked for a bit before we went to bed.  Once she left for her room, I started laying out all of my race stuff.  I like to lay it out the night before, make sure I have everything out that I'll need, because in the morning I'm so nervous and not thinking straight, that I know I'll forget something.  Well, to my utter dismay, frustration, and anger, I first came to realized that I had forgot to pack my iPod w/ headphones.  To many it sounds silly that I would get so upset.  However, I CANNOT run without music.  I get bored and the thoughts running through my head get too strong.  My music helps energize me and push me and drowned out all the negative thoughts in my head.  I was SO UPSET because I had made sure to pack them!  Then, last minute I had thought of a couple songs I wanted to add to my running playlist.  So, I had taken my iPod out of my suitcase to download them.  Well, I got distracted forgot to pack them up again.  UGH!!!!!  I was SO MAD and VERY UPSET!  I totally let it get to me!!!!!  So, for the next MANY hours, Mike and my sister worked very hard to get songs downloaded onto Mike's phone.  They were able to get into my playlist that had some of my songs but, not all of them.  Mike worked until 2am getting my list put together.  So, instead of going to bed at my normal time, I went to bed extremely late, extremely anxious, extremely upset and didn't get the sleep I needed.  

Morning came!  I woke up around 4:45 and started getting dressed.  I grabbed my clothes and found I hadn't packed my lucky running shorts that I have ran EVERY race in!!!!  This upset me too!  I love to run in those shorts, especially for my races!  They keep me cooled off and they also have a couple hidden pockets to store GU, etc.  Instead, I had packed some regular workout capris, which is fine and all but, still not my shorts.  I usually wear my compression socks but, knew I'd get hot with compression socks AND capri's (plus it would look DORKY, ha ha)!  So, I took off my compression socks (which I have never done) and ran with regular ankle socks.  I was nervous about this but, in case I forget, it didn't make a difference not having them on!  I also had some goals: finish in 2:45 and finish feeling good, not sick, and not dying.

****Steve (my brother-in-law), myself, Jocelyn****

The 3 of us got out to the starting line.  Steve was warming up by jogging all over the place, ha ha!  We found Amber Blair and her husband, Brian.  Pretty soon it was time to start the race.  We took off our jackets, put them in the clothing van, and we lined up.  This year, as we were getting ready to take off, fireworks went off!  It was so AWESOME!!!!  I don't remember them doing it last year but, of course, last year was my first half marathon and I was a HUGE ball of nerves!

The race began and I was feeling fine!  I knew there were over a dozen people I knew running this race so, I kept an eye out for them, although I knew many of them were way ahead of me!  The first person that came upon me was Dustin Tollefson!  He's like a brother to me and it was fun to see him for the short time I did!  He looked awesome and was running along, like he didn't have a care in the world.  He made it look so easy and effortless.  He ended up finishing a lot sooner than he had planned!  GO DUSTIN!!!

The next person I saw was Sam Hill.  He's in my ward and he and his wife, Barbara, have been a HUGE supporter in my running journey!  He is always asking how my running is going, how my races are, and was even at the marathon when I crossed the finish line.  Such an amazing, sweet, motivating person!  He too was doing VERY WELL and was just trucking along.

Then I ran into Joel Kroff.  Joel is in my ward, as well as my townhome manager!  He and his wife, Miriam, have been another HUGE supporter of mine!  They've really has been so excited and proud of me!  He was fun to see!!!!  I had been ahead of him but, when I got sick at mile 5-ish, he surged ahead and beat me.

 ****Miriam & Joel Kroff, Barbara & Sam Hill, myself****

The downhill part, after 1 1/2 miles into the race, was awesome!  I had a blast and loved it!  I felt great and really was right on my time with where I wanted to finish! I had even met some new friends.  These 2 ladies were so awesome, motivating, and just plain fun!!!!!  Then.....mile 5 hit me like a brick wall!!!!

I usually always get sick to my stomach at some point of each race but, it's usually around mile 7 or 8 and it comes on slowly and then leaves fast.  This time it hit me FAST!!!!!  And it lasted longer than usual.  I wonder if a lot of it too was the fact that I was so upset with my headphones, etc. that my nerves got the best of me.  Who knows?  So, I got super sick and wanted to die.  It finally let up and I was able to start running again.  I was afraid I had missed Mike and my sister as they were driving along the route.  However, I had just started running again, when they passed me!  One part of me was EXCITED to see them.  The other part of me wanted them to come back and pick me up.  I was pretty upset after being so sick.  It really set me back on my goal and kind of deflated me.  My 2 friends were way ahead of me but, then I decided to make a goal.  I knew that I was not going to hit my timed goal.  I would have to run faster than I ever had and I just wasn't feeling 100%.  So, I decided I would make a goal to try and beat those 2 ladies I had became friends with.  I could NOT see them anywhere so, I didn't know if it would happen but, I would sure try.  So, I was trucking along.  Finally, I saw them!!!!!  It was couple miles but, I finally caught up.  I think it was around mile 10 or 11 that I finally caught up with them and then PASSED them!!!!!  I still thought they might pass me so I just kept pushing and pushing.  Then around mile 12 I had had it!   I was in tears and just wanted to be done!  My brother-in-law, against his will, came back for me!  It was just what I needed to finish the race!  He talked and talked and talked so I didn't hear my own thoughts but, just heard him talking.  It was perfect!  Then, when I had about a 1/3 of a mile left, I came upon my friend, Kendra Tollefson!  I ADORE Kendra and have loved spending time with her!  She and her husband, Dustin, are such a positive influence on me!!!!  Next, I saw Jocelyn.  Jocelyn is AMAZING!  Even, when she doesn't want to do these races anymore, because she's ROCKING it at Crossfit, she does them anyway because she is THAT good of a friend!  Then, I saw my sister and my hubby!  Such a happy moment when is start to see everyone because then I KNOW that I can do it!!!!  Together, the 5 of us ran together and they all helped me to finish strong!!!!

****My sister, Stacey, her husband, Steve, myself, Jocelyn, Kendra****

As I came upon the finish line, I felt GOOD!  I didn't feel like I wanted to puke, die, or even cry!  I felt amazing and felt so loved because I had so many people that stayed there to cheer me on, even though I finished SO LATE in the race!!!!!  That meant SO MUCH to me!  There was Mike, Stacey & Steve (my sister and her hubby), Jocelyn, Dustin & Kendra Tollefson, Danyelle Evans (a friend on made while training for the St. George marathon, Sam & Barbara Hill, Joel & Miriam Kroff, and Chad & Marci Nell)!!!!  I couldn't believe it!  I have amazing people in my life!!!!

I DID IT!!!!!

****Steve, myself, Jocelyn****

 ****myself & Danyelle Evana****

 

 ****Jocelyn, myself, Kendra & Dustin Tollefson****

 

 ****The Kroff's, Hill's, & myself****

So, the Bryce Canyon Half was done and over!  Honestly, I don't plan to do this particular race again!  I had to do it again to prove I could do it better!  I did it a lot slower, yes, but I felt stronger after and that's an accomplishment for sure!  Now, I'd like to try some other half marathons, like the Top of Utah Half Marathon.  That's definitely on my bucket list.